To Love

To Love

 

Loving openly, honestly is the bravest and most courageous thing we do. Not loving someone FOR something. Not loving them because of what they do, or could give us, but because this person simply sparks delight. This love can be friendship, sisterhood, maternal, or something undefined. It is pure because there are no desires. It is pure because it is not based on an action, but on beingness. Accepting this love fully into whole being is a skill to learn. Loving this way can take much time too.

Eros, Philia, Ludus, Agape, Pragma, Philautia.

Our Western culture seems to place much more value on sexual love than say Agape, the generous universal love. We dismiss all love and loving relationships that are not with Eros. It is possible to love someone in all of these ways, at different times of our lives. 

You can not possess and ocean or a breeze, yet there is often a violent desire to possess a person and we call this love?  

I want this person to make me feel...?

 I want this person to...?

I want this person and then everything will be...?

None of these are loving. Loving is about the desire to wrap your arms around someone and make them feel safe, cared for, loved. We get so wrapped up in our feeling we almost do not need another person at all. Maybe this kind of love is our misguided way to have Philautia, self love. For loving our self kindly, honestly open the door to loving others.

When we do not require someone else to fill our cup, our hearts, our worthiness, then we able to full pour or affection towards others.

I try and spend a few moments every day dwelling in a state of love. For myself and for all those who I open my heart to. For those who can be anywhere, do anything and still I love them. For they are like stars, mururations, fireflies, a newly blooming flower, like sisters, mother's, brother's, children, lovers, and they are a delight.